Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Cherry Chocolate Rain

The talented and adorable director (and my good friend) Jeff Tomsic conceived and directed a music video/commercial for a new Dr. Pepper flavor. It stars someone with whom, I think, we are all familiar.
Check it.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

your welcome?

Here's a dilemma.

I get so many nice messages from people who see me on tv, writing me to say the nicest things that anyone could ever want to hear.

And I am flattered, gracious, and appreciative of their comments and emails.

But, for every 100 nice messages I get, I get one not-so-nice one from someone who doesn't like a show I did, a joke I made, or just the way my teeth look or the way I hold a microphone...you know, real stuff.

I've noticed 2 things in all of this.
One is that mean people's comments are ALWAYS left anonymously. How brave.

But, the 2nd thing is far more interesting.

I've noticed that the vast majority (but not all) of the nice comments read much like this:
"your great"
"your hilarious!"
"your so pretty!"

And, the mean ones read like this:
"You're not great."
"You're not hilarious."
"You're not pretty."

Notice who has the correct grammar.
I guess the meanies have time to proofread because they have no friends?

For those of you who are nice AND have good grammar, you are my FAVORITE!

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Karaoke Nightmare

Yes, I agreed to be in a contest.
Yes, it involves me singing and playing a pocket-sized "guitar hero" type game.

No, I cannot sing.
No, I cannot play the guitar. ("Every Rose Has Its Thorn does not count.)

Yes, you can watch me make a fool out of myself online.
And, yes, you can vote for me (or Jim Shearer).

But, you should also watch the outtakes from the shoot. They're actually pretty funny.

See it all here.
(Outtakes link at bottom of that page).

And, yes, you ask too many questions.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

"The assembly of this product requires two adults."

Today I learned that when Crate & Barrel prints the above sentence in their furniture assembly instructions, it is NOT, as I first thought, to piss off a single girl who doesn't HAVE a second adult to help her.

Instead, it is there because it is almost impossible to assemble the product with one person.

ALMOST.

I mean, my finger is bleeding and I can't move my back right now, but you can bet your ass that I have a new kitchen island.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Marry Me, Jonathan Goodwin

http://www.cnn.com/2007/TECH/11/20/green.hummers/index.html

Saturday, November 17, 2007

I Use Products

And sometimes, I tell beauty websites about them. Deal with it.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Best Alarm Clock Ever

If you live in a place like Albuquerque, Dallas, or Palm Springs, then you may have heard me on the radio this morning. I just finished a radio tour, and I have to say, there is NO better way to wake up a groggy mind than talking to six, overzealous, loud, bubbly, radio morning DJs.

Of course, there's also no better way to slowly drive yourself insane.

But, hey, at least you're awake.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Matchmaker Cabbie!

I had the matchmaker cabbie as my cab driver the other night!

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Irony

Isn't it odd how the utter inconvenience of having a $50 or $100 bill in your wallet in New York City is actually worse than having, say, twenty singles?

Monday, November 5, 2007

Dreams Really Do Come True

This is an uber-late post, but if you get a chance to dvr the Vh1 Top 20 Video Countdown tomorrow (Tuesday) morning, you will get to see one of my dreams come true.

Here are some hints:
me
jon bon jovi
make-out

Well, not so much "hints" as "exactly what happened."

I am still reeling...

Sunday, November 4, 2007

A Great Big Thank You

I went to Brooklyn to watch the New York City Marathon today.

It always gets me teary eyed to see complete strangers cheering on other complete strangers. It reminds me of that post-9-11 camaraderie that blanketed New York for a few months, when strangers hugged strangers and you couldn't find an asshole within 20 miles.

Here's what blows my mind, though. When we'd yell out "Go Andrea!" or "Good job, Riccardo!" or "You're DOING it, Jayne!" the runners would actually look at us, smile, and say "Thank you!"

Uhhhh.....DUUUUUDE! You're. running. a. marathon!

I think you can put the courtesy on pause for a second and save your breath...while you finish running.

...that MARATHON.

Saturday, November 3, 2007

No, I'm Going as a DOUBLE Hypocrite

As per my blog post from October 21st (below), this year for Halloween, I was not at all sexy.

I went as the "BOOBonic Plague." A pun on the bubonic plague, I was wearing a dress made of rags, furry boots, and I was covered in rats that had little boobs glued on them. I blacked out a tooth and covered my face in black smears of dirt. I did not look sexy at all.

Surely, I thought, my creativity and wit would draw attention away from the cleavage, midriffs, short skirts, Playboy bunnies, and sexy pirate girls that surrounded me.

And yet, not only did NO ONE figure out my pun (I got a lot of this: "Are you homeless?")...no less than 3 of my male friends looked at me with confused eyes and asked why I wasn't dressed sexier.

And, even more friends said, "I can't talk to you with that blacked out tooth."

WTF, people?

However, my "homme du jour" did tell me that I looked cute. I think I'll keep him.

Either that, or next Halloween, I am dusting off the old push-up bra. Fuck it.